Posted by: bree1972 | March 31, 2010

All the Boring Details 04/01/2010

You know how everyone who has surgery has to tell you EVERY BORING DETAIL?  Well, this is it – the one you’ve been dreading!

Ted took me to the hospital, they put me to sleep, and I woke up – minus my gizzard, and with other innards repaired and renovated.

In the recovery room the nurses kept trying to get me to “pump your little buddy” (I am not making this up. This was their cute term for “give yourself demerol for pain through a pump that the patient controls”).

I would say, “I’m not hurting.”   They would say, “Just give it a pump!”  I would say again, “I don’t need it!” 

At one point I overheard two nurses in the hall talking about me, saying, “Ms. Horton hasn’t given herself any pain meds.  I’m not used to a patient talking and cracking jokes.  They usually just moan and snore.”  Which, of course, made me more determined to not “pump my little buddy”. 

Six hours later, after having some really funny chats with the nurses (they finally decided I wasn’t crazy, I just was not in pain), I was taken to my room.

After getting me “situated”, the floor nurse came in, hooked me up again to the IV, and said, “Here’s your pain pump.  The pain pump is your ‘friend’.  Use it as much as you want.” 

I said, “I’m not in pain.”  She patted my hand, and walked out. 

Ted was going to spend the night with me that first night.  Frankly, I was afraid I would wake up, not realize where I was, and decide to stroll downstairs for a Starbucks latte grande (no kidding, there is a Starbucks on the first floor of this hospital).  But, once I realized I had been taken to the Women’s Surgical Floor, I sent Ted home (he begged to stay, but I insisted).  I had been on that floor before, and all kidding aside, the care you get is unbelievable.  It is only for women patients who have had “women” surgeries – like gizzard removals. 

By the time I said goodnight to Ted and sent him on his merry way home (excuse me, after they carried Ted kicking and screaming in protest out the door), I was beginning to feel like I needed a little help from my “friend”.  I pumped and watched as two drops of liquid ran into the IV in my arm.  I waited for instant relief.  Hmmmm.  I pumped again, and nothing happened.  After trying three more times, I called the nurse and told her my “friend” was off duty, and I needed another “friend”.

The nurse came and explained that the “friend” only works a little at a time.  Once you pump, you can’t pump again for 15 minutes – at which time you get two more drops of friendship.  This explanation was all very exciting, but by then all I was interested in was a friend that could MAKE ME STOP HURTING!  The nurse patiently explained that the secret was to stay “ahead” of the pain.  On a scale of 1 to 10, with one being no pain at all, and ten being screaming upcontrollably for relief, my task was to never let the pain get beyond a four without starting to use my “friend”.  I, on the other hand, had let the pain get to a twenty (my words, not hers), before I had asked my friend for help – obviously a no-no.

“Ok, ok, ok,” I said,  grabbing the nurse’s arm.  “Do you think my “friend” might have another “friend” she could buddy up with for some instant relief until friend # 1 decides to DO WHAT SHE’S SUPPOSED TO DO?”  The nurse pried my fingers off her arm, smiled, and said, “Of course!  I can give you an injection.  Are you sure now that you understand about ‘staying ahead of the pain’?”  Yes m’am, I certainly did.

By the middle of Thursday morning, I was disconnected from everything, and Ted and I were walking the halls holding hands.  Why this caused the nurses’ station such mirth I have yet to figure out.  Don’t people hold hands anymore?  One nurse asked how long we had been married, and we said 21 years.  Even knowing that, she actually wrote on my chart for the doctor to read, “Patient has been walking up and down the halls several times with her boyfriend.”  I didn’t get it, but whatever gives them a smile.

Seriously, I have done so well, and I give all the credit to God’s answer to prayers that were lifted up,  Ted will be driving me into Albany on Thursday for a doctor’s appointment, and I’m hoping the doc will think I’m doing so well he will ease up on some of the restrictions. 

And there you have it – all the boring details.  By the way, I took some “friends” home with me from the hospital.  I’m no dummy!

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” . . . Leo Buscaglia

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Responses

  1. A Starbucks in the hospital – what will they think of next.. If I was in charge of the hospital I would say a Ben & Jerry’s dispenser on every floor too! Ha! That is such a sweet image of you & Ted holding hands while walking around.
    Happy Thursday!

  2. Ahhh yes, I remember those friends…lol..no matter what the subject is Brenda, you can make me smile with your wonderful sense of humor. Thanks 🙂

  3. Now THAT would have been a “Kodak Moment” for the blog…you & Ted walking the halls, holding hands, with YOU in your HOSPITAL GOWN…..
    Dr. should be proud to see how well you are doing…keep it up & DON’T OVERDUE!

  4. You are S-U-C-H a master at telling a story Bree, even about topics like gizzard remodeling! Toooo funny…You told it ‘dead on’ about the after surgery pain vs. pain relieving magic friends- if I hadn’t been warned about it by a girlfriend, I wouldn’t have been so vigilent about it either..after all, what does the nursing staff know?!! smiles.

    Glad that’s all behind you now, I predict only sunshine & blue skies ahead..and I agree totally with Jill that WOULD have been a great Kodak shot to capture- of you and your boyfried strolling along. The hand holding is just soooo sweet!

  5. So glad you are recuperating so fast!! Great news and answer to all the prayers! Don’t overdo now just because you feel so good!! Praying for a good report at the doctor’s appointment..God Bless!! 🙂

  6. When I had my appendix removed I never got to have ‘a friend’. I feel a bit cheated! 🙂

    I think it’s cute that you and Ted still hold hands after 21 years! I wish there were more relationships out there. My hubby and I have been married about a year and a half and we hardly ever hold hands..I’m going to change that.

    I’m glad to hear that you are doing well (and didn’t sneak down for Starbucks in the middle of the night). Prayer does amazing things!

  7. If the truth be known, not only was Ted holding your hand, but he probably had a good grip on you so you wouldn’t run home to your computer! Although, it appears that you have been pretty well behaved following doctor’s orders! I couldn’t help but think of you on Friday, March 26 and hoping you were watching Paula Deen on The View. But then again, you might have split a stitch laughing. Sounds like you are recovering beautifully! You’re in my thoughts, daily! ~~Patty

  8. I enjoyed getting to meet you & Ted today in Belk’s!
    You’re a very sweet lady & I’m glad you are doing so well.
    Steve & I always enjoy your stories & photography. So much fun! Thanks.

    • Hi Anne!

      I’m so glad you came over and introduced yourself today! It’s so seldom that I get to “see” a friend I’ve made through the blogs, and it always makes me feels so good to meet a happy reader. Hope you continue to follow Ted, Maddie, Bear and I all summer! Have a great Easter weekend.

      Love in Christ,

      Brenda

      P.S. Hello to Steve!

  9. Brenda,

    Boring Details? Never! I don’t think you would know how to tell anything and it turn out to be boring.

    So glad your recovery seems to be going forward at such a fast pace. I don’t think I’ll challange you to another race because I hate to lose -unless it’s a losing tie.

  10. Brenda,

    Jim and I just got back from 15 days in FL. Sent my father-in-law back to IN and we stayed a few extra days and then drove his car home. Glad to be home.
    I had you in my prayers every day. But had no computer to even try to find out how you were doing. So tonight I’ve been catching up on the things going on with you. You are so good at telling a story. I love the one about your friend “the meds”. So happy to here you are coming right along.
    I had a note from Small Point and our reservation. It’s all a go so I’m looking forward to meeting you and introducing you to Small Point.
    Take care and God Bless.
    Charlotte


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