Posted by: bree1972 | May 7, 2010

For My Mom 5/7/2010

This weekend will mark the third year without my Mom on Mother’s Day.  So far there has never been a day that has passed that she hasn’t slipped into my mind in some way.  I think about her most when I’m alone – sitting quietly on the sun porch, or driving somewhere.  It’s in those situations that I talk to her – just like she is still sitting next to me.   I pour out my joys and my sorrows, my successes and my defeats.  How I miss the way I, even as a woman in my late 50’s, would walk over and sit on the floor in front of her chair.  I’d put my head in my Mother’s lap and wait for her hand to brush gently over my hair and for her to say those magic words, “It’s going to be ok – it’s all going to be ok.”  And I would always believe her.  Because she was my Mom.

People told me that time would make it easier, and in small ways that is beginning to be true.  I’m beginning to be able to focus more on the happy times we spent and less on the sadness of her last year.  Mom was a quiet person, and she often told me how happy she was I took after my Daddy, who never met a stranger and could talk to anyone about anything.  When she passed away, I spent days going through stacks and stacks of cards and clippings she had saved over the years.  There was a small newspaper clipping of something I had gotten an award for in my job, and on the margin of the clip she had written, “I was always so proud of you and your daddy.”   She knew I would find that note someday.

I’ve written about Mama one other time on this blog, but never in detail – and I’m still not ready to do that.  One day I will tell you her story. 

But for now, for this Mother’s Day, I’ll just share what was written on a frame I gave her once.  In the photo, the two of us are sitting on a swing at Callaway Gardens, and it is still one of my favorite photographs of us.  The inscription reads:

To The Mother Every Daughter Hopes For

You are my cushion when I fall.

Your love is unconditional.

You made our house a happy place to be.

You love me more than anyone.

I trust you . . . you never lie.

Even when you are angry, your eyes still say they love me.

Your warmth and love make me grow . . .

every day.

You always forgive me.

Whenever I need you, you’re always there.

If I could, I would give you anything in the whole world.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mama.  I love you.

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Responses

  1. Happy Mother’s Day to you Brenda and to all the other wonderful moms out there. Have a beautiful day!

    • Happy Mother’s Day to you, Hilde! Have a great one!

  2. A beautiful tribute to your Mom. I’m sure she’s very proud of you. Happy Mother’s Day, Brenda.

    • Thank you, Charlotte. And the same to you!

  3. Our moms are always with us. What a touching tribute to her. One of the sayings that gives me comfort is “With, without, within”. We know the kind of person she was by the kind of person you are. From the first day I met you I could tell that the two of you shared a heart and that you loved her unconditionally. You speak of her with such tenderness that I feel I know and love her, too. Happy Mother’s Day, Brenda.

    • Same to you, Cathie! Hope you will be able to see your kids on Sunday. Ours, as usual, are scattered everywhere.

  4. What beautiful photo of you and your mom. She will remain forever in your heart.
    Happy (early) Mother’s Day!

    • Thank you, Diane. Happy Mother’s Day to you also!

  5. I loved the tribute to your Mom Brenda..just said it all so perfectly. Showed your love for her in such a neat way.♥
    My mom has been gone for 17 years on the 21st and I still find myself often wanting to call her to tell her something great that just happened.. Mother’s day always makes me stop and think about how much she is loved and missed…
    I am blessed to have all 5 of our children close by and will be having a cook out with them this Sunday for Mother’s Day..may you have a blessed Mother’s day Brenda…:)

  6. Brenda,

    First off, Happy Mother’s Day to every mother who reads this.

    I may be a sentimental old man, but your tribute to your mother almost brought tears to my eyes. I know exactly what you mean. My mother died on December 1, 1983, but she is in my thoughts all the time. So often I think of things I would like to ask her. And yes, I do talk to her. Oh, I know she can’t hear me (I’m not completely stupid), but it sure makes me feel better. And sometimes when I’m talking to someone and say something that is “off the wall” or completely out of place, I can hear her say. “There you go again. You’re just talking to hear your head roar.” What a wonderful lady she was and what wonderful memories she left for me.

    With my wife’s mother, it is a completely different situation. She was 90 years old last February 1, but she has Alzeimer’s Disease and although she still recognizes us, she is so confused and mixed up. There are some days when she sees people going through doors or up stairs that aren’t there. She carries on conversations with people who aren’t there. She tells us about attending funerals and weddings that have never taken place. It is so sad to see her leaving us. For Mother’s Day we, and some others of her family, are going to take her to her house for a few hours. I have the yard in perfect condition and my wife and her sister gave the house a thorough cleaning. We’ll have dinner together and spend some time visiting like we used to. I just hope she will be able to remember it for a little while. It’s so sad and yet I’m so glad we can do it for her.

    • Thank you so much for writing, Lowell

      What a beautiful gift your family has planned for your mother-in-law. My prayer on Sunday will be that she can enjoy being in her own home again, with her family around her. Her memories of the day may fade quickly, but Lowell, the memories your family will have of this special Mother’s Day gift to her will live on and on. God bless you all for doing that for her.

      Please wish Faye a Happy Mother’s Day from me.

      Brenda

  7. By the way, Brenda, I noticed you mother’s name was the same as my mother’s name: Mama.

  8. My Mother has been gone 8 years. It doesn’t seem that long….but there is not one single day that goes by that she is not still speaking to me in some form or fashion. She didn’t give birth to me,, but she gave me life.

  9. Brenda, What a beautiful tribute to your mother; as I`m setting here reading this the tears are flowing. My mother, My best friend in the world, died 20 years ago tomorrow, on Mothers Day. I guess God called her home on that special day so she could spend Mother`s Day with her son and daughter that she had been seperate from in death for so many years.I t was time for them to get to spend Mother`s Day with her. I have missed her every day of my life since then. I`m always finding myself trying to ask her advice on something. And you would not believe how many times I`ve picked up the phone to call her. And just a few minutes ago I found a mother`s day card that my first grand child gave me before she could even write her name and she`s 27 years old now. I wasn`t looking for old cards, my hands just happened up on that. Now you`re talking about blubbering, i`ve really got it going today.
    Love you and Happy Mother`s day to you.
    Marianne

    • Thanks for sharing this, Marianne.

      Happy Mother’s Day to you tomorrow.

  10. Bree,
    Do you know HOW MUCH this world needs the DAUGHTER’S LOVE? You give that gift. I had a long life’s journey giving it to my mother who died just days after my birth & I was never told much about until I searched for it after my own first daughter’s birth, and the full blown love I gave to the mother I knew who raised me.

    One of the blessings of this journey of Love for me was to find out from my birth mother’s best friend, how happy she was to be pregnant, after adopting my older brother, and that she actually said: “Now I know the true purpose of my life.”

    We are all here by God’s great design. Enjoy God’s goodness on Mackinac Island. God loves you for sharing it.
    And so do I.


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